T.G.I.F.

i'm drawing on site at the dogpatch labs today-- drawing dragons doing keg stands, and playing games of beer pong-- and part of his horrible childhood, too.

but everyone has kindly mentioned that it "must suck to work on a friday."

that's a weird statement. for a number of reasons.

1. drawing dragons with beer-bongs is not work.
2. i'd been hoping to go to the labs and draw.
3. when you work from home and make your own schedule there is no such thing as a friday. there are seven saturdays.
4. my co-workers are stand-up comedians.

this job is rad. it's like being in that scene from swordfish where hugh jackman is getting a blowjob while trying to hack a computer system. except, minus the hacking part.

actually, i was thinking if i could describe my most recent jobs as a sexual experience, this illustration gig feels like sixty-nining a partner of equal experience-- we're both just doing our best to keep pleasing the other, while being pleased ourselves. it's a wondrously balanced trade of skills and power.

see, at the concierge job, i felt like someone was sliding a cold dildo up my rectum-- inch by inch, day by day-- and i would squirm and clench in hopes to stop the molestation, but that never worked. the dildo just went further and further until the day i gave up hoping they'd stop and just cock-slapped them and walked out.

city sightseeing was an interesting thing. actually, i think i fell in love with that job.

but we were really only fuck-buddies, coming to each other when we needed something mutually. i gave them entertainment and they gave me an audience, but they never cared about me-- i was tricked and thought we had something that never existed. the only thing i can say for myself is that at least i broke up with them and not the other way around.

i've had other jobs (manual labor, the liquor store, receptionist) where i might as well have just been a male prostitute, handed out orgasms left and right, never expecting anything in return.

but now: sixty-nine. nonstop.

every day is better than the next. not only am i paid to draw cartoons all day, but the few times i walk into the dogpatch labs, i'm greeted with great lines like, "here is your cash" or "if i buy you passes to six flags, would you want to go?"

it so does not suck to work on a friday. roller-coasters!