9:30 AM

"bullshit," my boss said, "you're supposed to double-space after a period."

"no," my assistant manager responded, "they changed it. now you only need one space after a period. it's been like that since the nineties at least."

everyone was late to work and no one tried to make up for it with good moods. they just arrived, clocked in, and got right into arguments about proper MLA format and the de-evolution of the grammatical human.

"you're supposed to put two spaces after a period," i said, "i think people stopped doing it because it shows up as incorrect when you send an email. but it's definitely the way you're supposed to do things."

"no! they changed it. i know it was that way, but they changed it."

and before our spacing argument could get too out of hand, a delivery man arrived to pick up one of our business card orders. he had a pbr pin on his jacket and an excessive beard on his face. i suppose riding packages on a fixie is any hipster's dream. but he was soaked and even his beard seemed slightly miserable.

not actually what the delivery man looked like, but i wouldn't put the possibility past him.

"someone dropped this," he said as he handed us a flash drive he'd found on our floor.

my assistant manager snatched it without looking at the man.

"not only did they change the period-rule," he continued, "but now they're saying sea lions may not be mammals-- they're saying they may be insects."

"have a good one," the delivery man mumbled on his way out.

"bullshit," i laughed, "insects? because of what? their tri-segmented bodies, exoskeletons, and six legs?"

"no," he said calmly, "because they have partitioned phalanges."

sam cooke sang in the background, don't know much about history... don't know much biology... don't know much about a science book... and i couldn't believe how poetic the scene was. what's the point of knowing much about any of that anyway? they'll just change it in the end-- all i know is i love you.

"shit, you know what?" i said.

"they have a very similar bone structure to insects is all i'm saying."

"no," i said, "the delivery guy left his bike lock."