A New Breed of Bullshit

before i left the house thursday night, i started the following post. i might have been thinking in out-loud text-- and my thoughts definitely changed by the end of the night.

i'll get to that in another post.

oh, and if you're expecting my thoughts changed because of finances and that i'm going to say, "on thursday night i miraculously got a job and everything was swell!" i'm not. i still have not found a job. well, i've found a bunch of jobs. but i haven't gotten any of them yet.

either way, i'll get to that part later.

so, before i left the house on thursday night i wrote...

if i receive one more email that begins, "we regret to inform you" i am going to have to regret to inform whichever company that's decided to join the Don't Hire President Wishnack team that their baby is located in a small ziploc bag somewhere in a bayview dumpster.

till this year, i had never gone to an interview and failed to get the job. well no, i take that back: there was an interview at a chiropractic office that gave each of the fifty potential employees exactly 60 seconds to explain why they should be hired. i told them i wasn't afraid of bees and that if they didn't hire me, there would be a day they regretted it. i didn't get that job.

but with that job as an exception-- and also something of a joke-- i'd gotten everything else i'd ever interviewed for no matter how unqualified i was.

however, i've just officially completed my third failed interview in a row. no camera store, no barback position, no macworld. and one interviewer told me he wanted to give me a hug! how the hell did someone else get that job? i don't want to imagine what went on at their interview. or was my hug a pity-hug? a "you need help" hug?

this is a new breed of bullshit.

in fact, the only good news i've received in the last week is that a girl i slept with did not actually have herpes, and it was only a strange allergic reaction to her birth control.

but the relieving news only relieved me into realizing that not having herpes doesn't pay rent or get me a job. and that i had other things to not be relieved about.

my finances are not really growing or shrinking right now, but i'm only halfway to my goal. and the other day, i had a guy lecture me about how i'm a part of THE SYSTEM-- how i'm buying things i don't need and how i eat up whatever capitalism feeds me. he and i only know each other through a mutual friend and his feisty diatribe wasn't received very well considering i had spent just $2.49 the entire day and it was on my only meal: a can of beans.

i mean, you wouldn't sing elliot smith songs to a suicidal acquaintance.

i'll say i'm definitely outside of my comfort zone, and it feels about as bad as it does good. i've never had so much trouble being hired. i'm trying very hard to keep this situation from unleashing my panda-punching evil side. no offense, karisma: it's just what can happen if i'm not careful when i feel really cornered.

and i still haven't come up with PHASE IV of my road to making $800 in time for february. but given that i haven't, i'm still technically on PHASE III: Go on an Adventure and i think i'm going to get out of the house right now.