5 Things I Just Heard (or Read)

1. "Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo." is something of a sentence phenomenon and is grammatically correct. "Buffalo" being the city in new york-- and a noun adjunct in the sentence, and "buffalo" either referring to the noun and animal or the verb meaning "to bully." the eight-buffaloed sentence can be rephrased as "Buffalo bison whom other Buffalo bison bully, themselves bully Buffalo bison."

2. an old lady walked by me at 6:30am and chuckled, "lord, oh lordy. 'nother day. yes."

3. ted williams, that homeless man with the smooth radio voice, is already getting job offers from the cleaveland cavaliers, and nfl films. it's this sort of insta-fame internet story that almost makes me forgive the internet for also making justin bieber successful.


4. a man-- who i am assuming is mostly blind, given his red and white cane-- was rushing by with a friend and commented on the rain. he said, "honey, i might be wicked, but i'm not gonna melt!"

5. today (january 6) is a holiday known as epiphany in greenland. it's a little like halloween during a different time of year and without half as much class. at epiphany, "both children and adults visit neighbouring houses and demand whatever they want." although, nowadays, that's limited to candy, buns, and pocket change-- otherwise i would come with a mask and ask each neighbor to give me their deeds. oh well. happy epiphany, greenland. i'm still going to find a way to take over your country and name it japoland.