Thursday, May 13, 2010

But, but, Edward?

i hadn't heard from my best friend edward in a while, so i thought i should send him a follow up email-- something i learned at work-- but it always helps to have new information in your follow up because it feels less contrived and more necessary; more caring.

also, we need to set up our ice cream date.

you would be amazed at what googling someone's email address will do.

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there is something wrong with how nonchalantly he accepted that i now how his cell phone number. i'm half-thinking he might take all this information to mean i'm on of his friends and i really would like to call him-- to prove him horribly wrong-- and relive the days of prank calls. some of you who i've known longer might recognize the name "james lancaster" as he is now about ten years old. he actually gets mail at my san jose house, which is weird.

there's just a lot of problems with my story and if i call mr. park from a 415 number, he's going to put together exactly why i wanted him to come to san francisco and probably that this is more of a joker than an actual creeper.

though you could argue that i am an actual creeper, depending on how you take all of this.

both ways, there's just a few more things i'd like to try here.

one being the "drunk-ex-girlfriend-emotional-roller-coaster" tactic.

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i think what bothers me is that he's remained so calm throughout this entire thing. part of me wants to say he's exhibiting the anti-bully technique: just be polite and it won't be as fun. but in the world of emails, it'd be easier for him to just ignore me entirely-- mark me as spam and let my messages disappear into gmail's endless pit of discarded advertisements and fwds.

but his "i love you" email is great-- it's the beginning to chaos. to me, that means he's shown his friends this conversation and they're with him on it. that's a standard "fuck off, you crazy" and it means he's moments from going berserk on me.

this is exactly why i should never have an office job.

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